No Hope for Gomez!


The Blurb:

It's the age-old tale:

   Boy meets girl.
   Boy stalks girl.
   Girl already has a stalker.
   Boy becomes her stalker-stalker.

   We've seen it all before, many times, but this time it's different. If only slightly.

    When Gomez Porter becomes a test subject in an experimental drug trial, he is asked to keep track of any strange experiences through a blog. What Gomez isn't ready for, is so many of his experiences suddenly seeming strange; the antiques dealer trying to buy his old tax papers, the phone-sex salesman who hounds him day and night, the super sexy research assistant who falls for him but is unable to express herself in terms outside the realm of science.

   But when one of the trial participants turns up dead and another goes missing, Gomez begins to fear for his life. No longer sure who he can trust and which of his experiences are real and which merely drug induced delusions, he decides it's time to go underground and work out a devious plan.

   Now, years later, his blogs have been recovered from a defunct server. For the first time we can find out firsthand what happened to Gomez as he takes us on a wild ride of discovery.

    Oh yeah, and there's also a nurse with big boobs!


The Buzz:

“Extremely witty and clever writing that contains keen insights into human nature.”
-- California Chronicle

“A very funny book; a veritable page turner of nonstop laughs. Buy a copy and find out for yourself!”
-- Reader Views

"A quick and unputdownable read that flies in the face of reason, and smashes against the wall of detective novels. It's a Coens Brothers' film formatted in book form."
-- BookReview.com

“The antics in this book will leave the reader laughing. Graham Parke is a genius.”
-- Readers Favorite


The Quotes:

“The stalker, meanwhile, stepped into the road. Didn’t even check for traffic. There wasn’t any, but something told me this was lucky for traffic rather than the stalker.”

“I shouted the perfect words to scare him off. It was just the delivery (and only the delivery) that made me sound like a twelve-year-old girl with pee running down her leg. I felt dirty and stupid.”

“Mathematicians finally developed a financial model to accurately compare apples and oranges. Any two kinds of fruit can be compared, although guavas still cause minor rounding errors.”

“We played for about half an hour before I realized we were actually playing two different games. What I’d thought of as ludo was actually a game called gin rummy, and what Warren was playing seemed to be a mixture of craps and table tennis. Once we started playing by one consistent set of rules, though, the fun was really over.”


The Excerpt:

   PDF Download




Copyright G.Parke

And, just because it keeps coming in, some

More Buzz:

“It is quite unlike anything I have ever read before. The book was written well and very true to this incredibly unique character.”
-- Broken TeePee

“A Novel in the Style of Our Time. Marries old-fashioned drama with the quirks of current communication techniques, completing a fast read of a novel.”
-- Grady Harp (Amazon US)

“It is swift, light, and fun with a great flow. Reading it feels like listening to a friend tell a story.”
-- Beths Book Review

“A wild ride of discovery! No Hope for Gomez! is a wonderfully witty, tongue-in-cheek look at people’s perceptions of life.”
-- Open Book Society

“I would be rather surprised if many readers guess the outcome correctly. This is an attractive story in a number of ways, one of these being how neatly the plot is worked out.”
-- David Bryson (Amazon UK)